Saturday, July 11, 2015

Chinandega

Chinandega
2008


Now, back into the current flowing past this quiet blue room,
back onto the leaving road. A taxi stops in the middle of the street.
I throw in my bag and go. He drives me to a market where I board
a bus. We move out onto a road lined with fence posts blooming
and trash... crowded with push carts, cars, bicycles, trucks, buses,
people and overloaded, tilting wagons pulled by half-dead horses…
all moving down the smelly gray river, a hydra-headed body marked
with trophies, fables and scars… moving... always in the same
direction... Chinandega... hottest city in Nicaragua... Chinandega...
where the hen and the rooster lie shackled together at the feet of
three women sitting at a table in the middle of the road. Chinandega...
where life is a way of keeping the meat fresh until it's time to eat.


asha
Barcelona - 2015

Sunday, June 14, 2015

Ontology of Clouds

Ontology of Clouds


A thrown stone finds its resting place
within the grass
the egg 
more than a tombstone
must shatter first into light

in the brutal night
on the back side of light
what is born must devour itself
in order to survive
this mirage
this promise and threat
like the egg
must be shattered

the dandelion lanterns
along the path 
soon blown out
are not a loss
no seed is a loss

for being born I inherited
a terrible darkness
but in the green light
of my first summers
seeing the wild mass of morning glories
swarming secretly over overlooked places
I knew all that was a lie

when the spirit is wounded
and the wound is deep
be gentle

in this ache
this flare of dying light
again and again
we risk everything
salt stained clouds
foam up the sky
it is on an afternoon like this
we will begin again
with nothing


asha
Ashland, Oregon - 1987

Sunday, June 07, 2015

Water Brother

Water Brother


When I see the brown hills lying
coldly in the sly distance
and the clouds     having lost their ocean
looking for a place to weep
and the crystal drop on the still leaf tip
                                                                     falls
I remember the angels
   perfumed and ancient as midnight
   new as silver of the waxing moon
who spoke to me of death.

At dawn I went to the hill that sleeps
and called their names
loudly     louder and louder
until even the snakes in their dens
shuddered
then softly I called them
quietly whispering each name
until there was no sound at all
but the tolling of a distant bell.....

It was then they came
sursum corda
scratching the sky
reaching through the eternal blue dream with their talons
clawing long blazing marks in the wind
and in that moment,
sweet inconsolable lover,  water brother,
one     mad     despised flower
with no petals at all/with translucent petals
growing beneath the bridge/beneath the fig tree
laughing to itself
bird on the morning breeze
empty of everything but light
bloomed.


asha
Ashland, Oregon - 1984

Thursday, February 12, 2015

Spirit Barrier

Spirit Barrier


I remember it all
the human flood
the empty chair
the calf crying
before a growling wind
lost histories leaking
through the spirit barrier
a delta of pain
draining into
a bayou of suffering.

I awake beneath
the magpie'’s beak
see it reach
for my eye
see the world
turn red and black
and white and fade.
This is not death
these quills
brushing against my breast.
I am smudged and washed
and swaddled
in the stiffening sheen
of my own blood
and readied for flight.


asha
Spring, 2004

The imagery is violent, but  necessarily so, as it describes a time when light must find us  because we cannot find it.

Sunday, December 07, 2014

Winter Solstice


Winter Solstice


It has always been spoken of
as the grave and womb of light
this most brief day
this deepest midnight
stiffened with ice and silence.

It is crucial now that there be
harbors and pools and islands
of light

and it is necessary
that there be song
for the dead are everywhere
stricken with grief
wandering among the birds of winter

but with song they may be comforted
and Love, on this longest of nights,
requires the giving of a gift.


I wrote this poem as poet-in-residence at Actor's Theatre in Ashland Oregon, at the request of the Director, Michael O'Rourke, and added the graphic later as the two seemed particularly suited to one another. It's based on a photo I took of a full moon rising over a wash (small canyon) in the mountains of northern Nevada. It was a ridiculously difficult place to get to, Unfortunately, after a few unusually wet springs and flash flooding, I doubt access to this magical place even exists anymore.
 

Monday, August 04, 2014

Drift

Drift


I have been up all night
writing and re-writing
tomorrow
watching the stars
tick across the sky.
Around midnight
the Big Dipper is just
beyond my window.
By 3 am only stars.
No names.
Then in the hush
just before dawn
when time slows
nearly to a stop I see
my grandmother’s dog
the one she made live outside
that entire North Dakota winter
his pleading, cold-crazed eyes
a sad, two-star constellation.
They shot him in the spring.

The sun doesn't rise.
The world falls face first
into its light
finds its mark
resumes the
fiction of the day.

With regret I sense
before I can see
the Holy Dark
dissolve into grainy
morning. Here and there
a bird stirs in its quills.
Before long
they are on the roof
rattling the gutters
pecking at the tiles.
One of these days
they will pull
the house beam out
and the whole thing
will fall down.


asha
Nevada

Wednesday, July 30, 2014

La Pared

La Pared


They are not gone, they
are gone home past bricks
lost beneath plaster, beneath
paint, posters, handbills
fragile as snakeskin abandoned
to the sun and wind, past the
stenciled telephone and
"Jesús, el teléfono del diablo",
a face, "Mexico, poco real",
and startled black figures
suspended in a running
tumble, past creeping vines
turning what was once a wall
into a crumbling spine
blackened by the repeating,
always humid afternoon.

When the day is done I
open my window to the street
stir my brush into the sleeping
paint and begin again.


asha
Mexico, 2004

Sunday, July 27, 2014

Aeon

Aeon


I am working my way back,
practicing speech, re-learning
the language spoken at the bottom
of the world, where the hair is.

I am threading my way back
through the complicated rain
where the words were. They
do not want you to read this.

I am learning your language,
working my way back to our
last universal common ancestor
enrapt by blue black dawn.

She is the moon we see traveling
at the edge and words spoken from
dream. Listen. I am re-learning our
language. These are the words they

do not want us to speak, this silence
reverting to the mean. The lost river
has brought us together, this moment
taking shape within us.

And all this time, her lying dead in the
ground and me looking everywhere
to find the stone that has not moved
and trees willy nilly where their seeds fell.


asha
Nevada, 2004

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

Re-beginnings

Re-Beginnings
Seattle, 1979 –  On the occasion of my mother’s death


Touched by your eyes, I quake. Whatever is good has ceased to flow. I throw the poison mirror away. The walls close towards center. Barely room to breathe.

Morning comes and again I resolve to survive the day, overcome this. We had planned to do that. Times have been better. My flesh hurts. I plunge back into sleep.

But the urge comes again, jarring open my eyes. You aren't here. What am I creating here? Or am I just re-living-re-living-re-living the worst old outcomes? There was a truth here somewhere. Sinking, my thoughts become seeds seeking the comfort of the dark. Memories are of no value. Where I am now I am safe, between everything, away and alone under a high cloud sky.

In this inner world of the closed flower there is a moment’s rest. The wind and tide erase all. I do not speak the language here. It is a comfort. I communicate through half tones, faint smiles. Outside the petals, rain and finally a clear sky and distant mountains asleep
under their snow. Having held back too long, I do not cry. We bend or break. Now I lay me down to sleep. The rain drenched petals creak. I am lowered into the storm, small boat, small wings, to try the sea.


asha